Thursday, December 8, 2016

"Yoga Hosers" (2016) Review

Kevin Smith has certainly had a very interesting career. He’s been behind the camera, in front of the camera, on stage for Q&A nights, and behind the microphone as a podcaster. Kevin Smith’s film career kicked off more than 20 years ago and over the course of twelve films he’s made a name for himself. That name might vary depending on who you ask but through it all Smith has maintained a loyal cult following. Kevin Smith’s latest film, 'Yoga Hosers', might change all of that for some fans. NOW HOLD ON! I have to confess that I am a huge Kevin Smith fan. From the early years of ‘Clerks’ and ‘Chasing Amy’ to his recent podcasts and directorial duties on the CW. The man is living every fanboy’s dream of talking about comic books and nonsense for a living. However, his two most recent films, ‘Tusk’ and ‘Yoga Hosers’, seem to be getting a lot of hate from both fans and critics alike. I thought I might take some time to check out one of these films for myself. Seeing as "Yoga Hosers" is now available on Netflix and I already have a subscription so let’s start there.

WELL! "Yoga Hosers" certainly is a bizarre movie. The story of how the film was made is far more interesting than the actual movie itself. If you have the opportunity then you should definitely listen to Kevin Smith talk about all the behind-the-scenes on his podcasts. In fact, I recommend looking it up before watching the movie because it’ll give you a much better feeling of where this absurd film came from in the first place. Kevin Smith can spin quite the yarn about his film-making process. This is a very personal piece for Smith and it clearly shows. Now for the “plot”?…

The movie stars Harley Quinn Smith and Lily-Rose Depp as two teenage girls working at a convenience store in Manitoba, Canada. The two girls are named Colleen M. and Colleen C. respectively. These clerks are quintessential millennials with their faces in their phones and zero respect for authority figures (besides, maybe their yoga instructor). Smith has once described the film as “Clueless meets Gremlins”. The gremlins of this creature feature come in the form of pint-sized Nazi bratwursts called “Bratzis”. They are the creations of a mad Canadian Nazi scientist from back in the 1940s. Through a series of random events, these two teenage yoga hosers have awoken the Bratzis and their Nazi master from cryogenic sleep and must now deal with the consequences. They are not alone though. Johnny Depp reprises his role from “Tusk” as Guy LaPointe and aids the Colleens in their strange monster hunt. Of course, wacky hi-jinks ensue.

Kevin Smith’s major defense for the film is that it’s meant to be nothing more than a goofy kid’s movie. I can see that as a valid argument from the director. Art is completely subjective and there are genuine moments in the movie where I can see young teens enjoying the campiness of it all. Maybe even younger children could unironically love the movie. To me this seems more like Kevin Smith’s home videos with himself, Johnny Depp, and their two daughters. It’s a very small film with a budget of only $5 million but it only grossed $39,585 at the U.S. domestic box office. No major loss for a big studio but quite a lot of money to put forward for a family man and his kooky kid’s movie. I respect what Kevin Smith has been attempting with his “True North” trilogy. He’s just trying to make the movies that he’s always wanted to see on the big screen but knows that nobody else will ever make. That’s a noble cause but these movies just aren’t my cup of tea. There's a bit of meta-humor towards the end of the film involving the attempted murder of all the world's critics that I found funny coming from Kevin Smith. ”Yoga Hosers” has fun moments and the celebrity impressions from Ralph Garman are delightful but I couldn’t enjoy the movie all the way through. Like I said, the behind-the-scenes of the film is much more interesting than the actual movie itself. If you’re still a fan of the movie then that‘s great! Enjoy the movie and enjoy all of Kevin Smith's bizarre upcoming projects. I’ll just be sitting here and waiting for him to finish developing ‘Clerks 3’  and ‘Mallrats: The Series’. On second thought, I'm still looking forward to "Moose Jaws". It's "Jaws" but with a moose instead of a shark!!!

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